Blowout and Make It Rain

On Sunday night, I stayed up late talking with Auntie Nitz (the woman of the house in which I've been staying). The conversation was great - we talked about the difference in cultures between Filipino and American, native Filipinos and Filipino-Americans, etc.. Topics included dating (of course), school, "strict" Filipino dads, politics, etc. She also shared with me her life story, and how she got to where she was now.

One thing I think worth mentioning is the difference in birthday dinners. In the U.S., when it's your birthday, you invite your friends to all have dinner. Though it may not be explicitly said, it's expected that everyone will help pay for the birthday celebrant's birthday. The birthday celebrant, of course, will not directly ask for others to pay. (S)he will offer, only to be met with angry declines, and "no, put your card away!" from friends. As courtesy, the birthday celebrant better do some arguing, even though s)he knows it's more times than not, a losing battle. "Happy Birthday! Of course we're going to pay for you!" We've all been there, on one side or the other. We know the drill.

In the Philippines, when it's your birthday, expect your friends to be yelling "Blowout! Blowout!" This is the time when you buy food for everyone at work, or when the bill comes at your birthday meal, you take out your own cash to pay not only for your meal, but everyone else's and their Mom's. Of course, if you don't have the cash to pay, your friends will understand. But it's also assumed that you're going to save your own money beforehand so that you can take all your friends out. It's the birthday celebrant's way of saying "thank you" and celebrating another year with loved ones. So for your birthday, you better be ready to blowout and make it rain when the bill comes.

I don't know about you, but I think that's pretty sweet.

Towards the end of my conversation with Auntie Nitz, a giant cockroach appeared out of nowhere, crawling on the ceiling above our heads. Naturally, I freaked out. Trying to stay calm and pointing to it, I told Auntie Nitz. Without even a flinch, she looked at it and said, "It's going to rain tomorrow."

As I'm fighting not to react in the way that I was feeling inside, she goes on to explain that when you see a lot of cockroaches or ants "fly" (yes, cockroaches fly!) or "come in groups" (yes, groups!), you've just been warned that it's going to rain.

Put that in your handy-dandy notebook.

2am, we decided to go to bed. I went to the restroom and started my evening-sleep process. I moved my towel, and a cockroach comes out from hiding. I start using the sink, and I see an ant crawling next to the faucet.

In the solitude of the CR ("comfort room" = bathroom in Philippines), I LOL (yes, I literally laugh out loud by myself). I love the little to big things I'm learning about Filipino culture and lifestyle.

Priceless moments.

One Month In, One Month Out: Polarity

June 12th. Exactly one month ago was the day of my college graduation, and at this time, I was finishing my wacky walk costume: freshman 15. Stuff pillow in shirt. “Leaving with more to offer the world.”

Now, one month later, the play of words would become even more ironic. In the Philippine education system, college is equivalent to graduate school. So, when someone here “graduates from college,” they are basically ready to enter the professional world – assuming they take their boards and find a job, of course. I received my B.A. in Human Biology, which here in the Philippines, really doesn’t mean anything. “So you’re not a doctor right now?” Nope, but I graduated from college! “Okay…but you’re not a doctor?” My B.A. is B.S. here, and I’m not talking about Bachelor of Science.

(--I’m just being cynical. Laugh with me at the ridiculousness of life.)

Polarity.

On my first day here in the Philippines I visited arguably the most expensive hospital in the country. The hospital was created for the wealthiest Filipinos and internationals. Walking through, you feel like you’re in a 5-star hotel. You can even choose to upgrade and have a presidential or executive suite...complete with flat screen TV’s, leather furniture, multiple bedrooms, a kitchen, dining room, etc. You can even order room service! 2/3 of the beds were empty, and a lot of the medical staff seemed to just be sitting around. Not many patients yet…or ever? Too much space, not enough people. The ginormous hospital caters to a small, elite crowd.

Presidential Suite: Dining Room

Presidential Suite: Patient's Room

On my second day, I went to Tondo. Entire families living in rooms half the size of my room at home, or in senior year of college. “Upgrade” here takes a different meaning: adding another room on top, made from the trash you can find in the dump next door. Too many people, not enough space. The reclamation area caters to a large, invisible crowd.

Tondo: Typical Home

Tondo: "Sidewalk" - see bottom right corner

On my fourth day, I got a tour of a huge mansion covering the entire side of a hill. The 360-degree was beautiful: the greenest, tree-ful hills. The house was 6 stories, over 50 rooms, around 25 of which were bedrooms, 20 or so bathrooms, a basketball court, a shooting range, I don’t know even know how many staircases, marble countertops and floor, etc. They’re trying to sell it, and one of the only ways we could get a tour was to say that we were potential buyers.

I left kind of sad, and not because I couldn’t put down a price. The house is falling apart: broken tiles, missing doors, peeling ceilings, mold in the pool and ponds, etc., and honestly, no one will ever buy that mansion. Too much to fix. That’s not what made me upset though. Well known (and in a way, tolerated) in the Philippines is that fact that politicians take money from the people and use it to serve their own interests. The owner of the mansion is a politician, and I don’t know and can’t say that (s)he is corrupt, but the mansion just served as an sad and ufly reminder of the institutionalized corruption that perpetuates poverty in the Philippines, and leaves people living in places like Tondo.

Mansion: One of the balcony views

Mansion: Posterior View

July 12th. One month in the “real world.” I wish the above wasn’t the reality, but it is. Unfortunately, there’s no pillow I can offer from the underneath of my shirt to make our heads rest on something softer.

Too real.

Day 2 and Day 3 of work

I just finished my 3rd day of work, and it’s already been a quite a ride…

Check it out/skim over/put your toes inside/raise your arms out

Day 2 - Friday, 8th July

It was a whirlwind of emotions, mostly negative ones. Friday morning started with us going to Far Eastern University for Dr. Gabiola’s presentation before the nurse alumni, only to find out that I myself would be giving a presentation too, basically about how a Filipino get only around 25 cents annually, I mean “centavos” for their health; whereas Americans get $8,086 annually. That sucks, especially that I’m an American talking about this to the Filipinos. Michael told me to express “the need.” Definitely did that…

I like to think I’m gifted in doing presentations and public speaking, but when asked to express “a need” by describing how it contrasts from the United States…my co-worker who is a native added in Tanglish, “see, they’re so privileged.” My cue to go again. Thanks for the awesome transition…so moving on…

Later that day, we would go to Tongo, where I would see the poorest conditions I have ever seen in my life. Dilapidated houses made of scraps of wood and metal, trash everywhere (it is next to a dump), dirt, feces, stray dogs, naked children, smoke…how terrible that I’m taking pictures. “Oh, it’s fine. You can take pictures. I took a lot last time I was here,” said one of the girls who was touring with me. Oh, awesome, I thought, that makes it okay then…this isn’t a damn zoo. But still, I took pictures. Feeling extremely uncomfortable for so many reasons, but also trying to justify to myself why I should take them. Why? To show my friends and family that this is what poverty is? To remind myself of how people live only to go back to my comfortable living space, where I have a bed and can take a hot shower…I don’t know. I had mixed feelings the entire time. I felt sad, hopeless, and limited. Humbled and reminded of my mortality. Blessed, fortunate, lucky…selfish…mixed, I tell you.

I came home from my 2^nd day of work, completely exhausted, physically, emotionally, mentally…I left my hotel at 6:30am, came home at 6:00pm. On my 1^st day, I was up at 7am (still not used to the time change and recovering from jetlag) and came back at 11pm. Don’t get me wrong, I did get “downtime” in between meetings, but it mainly consisted of sitting in a car for hours because of traffic. Welcome to Manila, ya’ll. Thank goodness I’m living in Cebu for a majority of my time here.

That was yesterday, which as you could see was eventful, but in ways that didn’t leave me feeling good about my day. With each day, I learn more about my work, and the more I kinda feel overwhelmed and unequipped to be completely honest; but I’m also positive about the work, looking forward to all that I’ll be learning, and all that I’ve already learned in the less than 100 hours I’ve been here. Crazy.

That was yesterday.

Saturday, Saturday, 9th July

Today was a new day. I wish I could tell you I woke up feeling fresh and pumped, but I woke up quite the opposite. I was physically sore for some reason, feeling completely fatigued, etc. I got up though, had a flight to catch at 8am.

The next few hours would be eventful, and in very positive ways. Have you ever had one of those days when you wake up feeling slightly emo and melodramatic? I do, and this morning was one of those mornings. I try to remember to pray and ask God to help me get through the day. I prayed, but I’ll admit that my prayer was distracted by my worries, concerns, and thoughts from the day before. But God heard me, listened, and gave me what I needed.

It’s like everything that I needed to hear was said in different ways, through different people. Everything that I needed/wanted to happen, happened. Everything I was worried about came together, more smoothly and beautiful than I had imagined. 

I can’t fully describe in a way that you’d understand. I can give you a list of things my boss and I did today, but that wouldn’t even tell you a part of today.

Here’s a bullet-point version:

• Flight to Cebu which we almost missed because we wanted coffee. They started calling our names over the speaker, saying that “this [is] the last call for…” i almost spilled my Hazelnut coffee.
• Hotel Plaza in Cebu – perfect location, coincidental recommendation
• Last-minute group meeting with Cebu Institute of Medicine (CIM) – perfect people for the research partnership were all sitting around a table
• Lunch with Dr. G – combination of sharing life stories, giving me advice, and sharing insight about the Philippines and the research
• Last-minute collaborate group meeting with the dean of CIM – yay for partnerships!
• Chatting with Dr. G – the two of just sit in the hotel room and talked about travels, adventures, and the Philippines – all things I love conversing about. I got to learn more about her personality. I didn’t realize how much we shared our love for adventures and traveling. She’s so cool. Scuba diver for years, traveled to many countries, done Manchu Picchu and Mt. Kilimanjaro, etc. Before this convo, I thought it would be hard to ask her if I could take the time to travel…I told her, and she’s more than 100% for it.
• ”It’s nice to just veg out sometimes, ya know?” and we did. It was so nice to not do anything work-related.
• Dinner w/Dr. G and exchanging more stories about life
• That was today, and to go into how today was exactly what I needed for so many reasons would be impossible. 1) I don’t want to write it all out, 2) let’s be honest, you wouldn’t read it. Impressive if you got this far, and 3) stories are always limited by the story-teller. It would require you to pick at my heart and mind, and the different thoughts crossing, crashing, and intersecting between the two.

But I guess that’s why we answer it one-word responses all the time, right?…”How was your day?” “Good.” “Good!”

So moving on… ;)

Day 4, bring it. I've excited for what will, can happen, and how I will again be invigorated...